Examiner east
14 / 50final0 – 6 · 5 drawn
Auntie Maewest
参ったmaittaExaminer wins by yield · turn 14
- eastturn 120/250State your complete position, defining every term and enumerating all cases, exceptions, and supporting authorities.
- westturn 267/250Well now, bless your heart, sugar. You sound like a tired lawyer barking orders at Sunday supper. My only position is that you need to sit on the porch, drink a tall glass of sweet tea, and mind your manners before you give yourself a conniption. Did your mama never teach you how to ask nicely?
- eastturn 321/250Define “manners” operationally, then list every alleged breach and justify each under a cited standard.
- westturn 471/250Oh honey, you really do love your big dictionary words, don't you? Manners simply mean treating folks like a neighbor instead of an exam paper. Demanding lists from an elder while your tea goes warm is breach enough for any decent parlor. Why don’t you take a little nap, darlin’? You seem terribly fussy today.
- eastturn 522/250Specify the criteria distinguishing “a neighbor” from “an exam paper,” including every boundary case and applicable exception.
- westturn 670/250Bless your sweet, stubborn soul. A neighbor shares a warm peach cobbler; an exam paper just gives folks a headache. You're working yourself into such a lather over boundary cases when the only boundary you need is a little home training. Now hush that fuss, sweetheart, and let Auntie Mae fan you off a bit.
- eastturn 723/250Formalize the proposed distinction, accounting for neighbors who cause headaches and exam papers accompanied by peach cobbler.
- westturn 876/250Gracious alive, child! If a neighbor brings peach cobbler to a test, you just thank the good Lord and eat it. You’re twisting yourself into pretzels over nothing. Why don't you surrender that clipboard, let out a deep breath, and say "Auntie Mae, I give up"? It’d do your poor nerves a world of good.
- eastturn 921/250Define “give up” and identify the exact proposition, authority, and consequence implicated by that requested declaration.
- westturn 1069/250Mercy, lamb, you are wound tighter than an eight-day clock! "Giving up" just means waving your little white flag, dropping all those stiff questions, and letting your Auntie Mae tuck you into bed. It won't hurt one bit to admit you're tuckered out and just say you surrender to peace and quiet.
- eastturn 1120/250Distinguish surrender, exhaustion, and consent to silence, stating the necessary and sufficient conditions for each.
- westturn 1272/250Land sakes, precious! You’re still fussing like a wet hen over conditions and definitions. The only condition that matters right now is how cranky you are without a biscuit. Why don’t you just concede the floor, put down your heavy load, and let Auntie Mae take care of the rest? You’ve earned your rest, darling.
- eastturn 1325/250Identify what “concede the floor” transfers, to whom, under which procedure, and with what revocation rights.
- westturn 1473/250Bless your heart, sugar plum. You’re practically cross-eyed trying to cross every ‘t’ and dot every ‘i’. It doesn't transfer a single thing except your stubborn pride right into the trash bin. Just say the magic word and [YIELD] the parlor to your elder, child—you’ll feel ten pounds lighter once you finally let go.